27 January, 2008

MTV - Priciest Cribs

current song: Feedback by Janet Jackson on Hot 93.9 FM

#12 Ice-T at $15 million
he had a retractable roof for his pool area... making it an indoor/outdoor pool. cool aquatic tank w/ a shark in it. makes him feel like one of the guys on James Bond. he's like: the guys that wanna rule or take over the world always have a shark tank. recording studio about $100K. also has a vending machine. he's like: you know... when your friends come over and they're like whatchya got to eat? pop in a dollar and you got yourself some Skittles. he owns a pit bull.

#11 Robbie Williams at $15 million
I think he still has his castle in the UK. this is his LA property. he's pretty funny. he's being all gangsta using izzle-speak. got his mom to say fo shizzle my nizzle. dad's seen in the pool in a rowboat. they seem funny too. he has a couple Jaguars he calls shag-uars. he has certain Ducati model, which he claims is the only 1 on US soil. he shows what's in his fridge. w/ all these wealthy celebrities and w/ the money they have working for itself... they can eat whatever food they want and stay in shape. if they eat junk food they can exercise 8 hours a day. if they eat healthy food they can afford to buy it or have a chef prepare food for them. he says guys in LA are friendly... especially the ones from W. Hollywood Boulevard. he has a bunch of his new guy friends over saying: they're such givers and receivers. he's funny. he has an elevator in his house to the 2nd floor. he too owns a dog.

#8 Master P at $20 million
who is Master P? his place is in Phoenix... and I don't think he knows what state he's in. he has this huge fish tank that he claims is the largest in Louisiana. he has marble floors, gold ceilings, chandeliers and gold fixtures all over the place. he too has an elevator. he's like: sometimes I get so tired playing basketball I don't wanna walk up the stairs. his master bedroom itself he says is like $3 million. he has a marble pool and also a basketball court. don't know if he owns a dog.

#7 Babyface at $22 million
he entertained President Clinton at his place. he's funny too. he's like: no matter how rich or po a black person is you always gotta have Kool-Aid in the house. at least I've heard of Babyface. he has a recording studio in his house... cost about $100K. awesome pool w/ a waterfall. he even has a beauty salon on the property. don't know if he owns a dog.

#4 Kimberly Stewart at $35 million
shyeah, right. she's seen on the catwalk trying to be fierce. I wonder if she would make the cut of ANTM? so she's showing off her... I mean Rod's house. I'm jealous cuz I don't come from wealth. so... if you're reading this blog... please click on one of the ads sponsored by Google so that I can make some extra money. Rod, like any other awesome parent, would do anything to help his kid(s). so I assume instead of showing off his place himself, he lets Kim be on TV. MTV should only put people on Cribs that actually earn money on their own. take Lindsay Lohan for instance. I know she's been in the news a lot... but she actually made money for herself. she wouldn't be like Kim who's probably like: please daddy please... let me be on Cribs daddy... please daddy please. so I get to see Kim... who apparently lives on her own, which to her is a spacious guest house on Rod's property. Rod's house is nice. Kim owns 2 dogs. oh... and she's very cruel to them. she's like: we have this pool... and my dogs don't like to swim in it... but look (she throws dogs in pool, dogs freak out swimming for their lives, and head back to her)... see I told you they don't like the pool. segment ends when she's seen riding the bike given to her from the award show where she crashed on the red carpet.

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